Tweens ,Teens, Elementary

SELF-CARE & MINDFULNESS AT HOME

Grade Levels: All Levels

Social Emotional Learning focus: Self-Awareness, Self-Management

During times of uncertainty, our children inevitably will notice the tension going on in the world around them. When the nervous systems of the adults in their lives are activated, it acts as a warning to children, whose own nervous systems become activated as a result.

Now more than ever, parents have the opportunity to share the tools of self-management through mindfulness activities. By sharing our calm, not our stress, we can mitigate the impact on our children in some significant ways. The following are some strategies for bringing mindfulness into your home:

1. Put Your Oxygen Mask on First: Just like in a flight emergency, it is always suggested to put your oxygen mask on first. Do what you can to support your own well being, and manage your own fears. Remember that simply intentionally slowing down your breath, and feeling your feet on the ground, can go a long way towards calming the nervous system. Research on the concept of interpersonal neurobiology tells us that, in fact, children and adolescents actually “borrow” the self-regulation of calm adults in order to learn how to regulate themselves. Here is a wide range of helpful resources specifically on coronavirus and health anxiety from the Anxiety and Depression Association of America

2. Keep Calm - And Be Honest: Most children will have already heard about the virus, so parents shouldn’t avoid talking about it. Not talking about something can actually make kids worry more. Look at the conversation as an opportunity for you as the parent to offer the facts and set the emotional tone. Here is a great resource from NPR that can help with the conversation in comic book form. Just For Kids: A Comic Exploring The New Coronavirus

3. Focus on Safety!: Kids feel empowered when they know what to do to keep themselves safe. Teach them what they can do to offer a sense of autonomy and responsibility in the situation. Being able to take action in a situation that feels threatening is usually very helpful. Remind kids that they are taking care of themselves (and others!) by washing their hands with soap and water for 20 seconds (or the length of two “Happy Birthday” songs) when they come in from outside, before they eat, and after blowing their nose, coughing, sneezing or using the bathroom.

4. Move It to Soothe It: When stress arrives at our doorstep, it often triggers a very natural “Fight or Flight” response. Creating opportunities for movement can directly soothe your child’s nervous system response. Take advantage of some early spring weather, and get your kids walking or running outside, onto bikes and scooters, on hiking trails, and anything else that is accessible to you. Do it as a family and you’ll reduce your own anxiety as well! If weather is not permitting, try putting on online yoga videos or simply put on some music and dance!

5. Just Breathe: As simple as it sounds, intentional breathing is the most direct way to address a stress response. By taking a deep breath, a signal is sent to the brain that alerts the nervous system that all is well. However, a “deep breath” must come from the diaphragm - a muscle in the lower part of the belly - in order for it to be effective at soothing the mind and body. You can tell if you are getting a proper breath if your belly is expanding and getting bigger on an inhale, as well as contracting and getting smaller on an exhale. The following are some breathing activities you can practice with your child:

Breathing Exercises

Breath Buddy

This exercise encourages and teaches diaphragmatic breathing. Have your child lie down with a bean bag, stuffed animal or other soft object on their stomach. Their belly should rise and fall with inhale and exhale. This gives a good visual for those first learning how to breathe in this way.

4 Square Breath

Inhale for 4. Hold for 4. Exhale for 4. Hold for 4.

4-7-8 Breath

Used by paramedics, surgeons, and other professions with high stress response. Inhale for 4 counts, hold for 7, exhale slowly for 8.

Five Finger Breath

Tracing fingers while inhaling up on finger and down on the exhale until you’ve taken 5 deep breaths.

Ocean Breath

Try to make the sound of waves by exhaling with a “shhhhh” sound.

Hot Chocolate Breath

Encourages slow breathing. Hold a pretend cup of hot chocolate. Take a deep breath in and slowly let the breath out, pretending to cool down your cup.

Bumblebee Breath

This is a very self-soothing breath! Cover ears with hands. Inhale deeply, exhale with a hum to make a sound like a bee “buzz.”

Snake Breath

While laying on stomach, place hands underneath shoulders. Press into the floor to lift the chest on an inhale. On the exhale, lower the chest down while making a “ssssss” noise. Hold breath on exhale. This breath is cooling and relaxing.

Lion Breath

While on all fours, inhale curl the spine by tucking the chin and the tailbone. On the exhale, arch the back by lifting the head and tailbone while dropping the belly. Exhale should be done with a strong “HA” while sticking the tongue out. This breath is for releasing stress and dealing with difficult emotions. The motion in the body is also called Cat/Cow. This action stretches and strengthens spine, improves posture and balance, increases coordination, creates emotional balance, relieves stress by massaging adrenal glands (relaxing the fight/flight impulse).

Breath of Joy!

This breath is great to wake you up in the morning! Take 3 sharp inhales to fill the lungs, followed by one long exhale.

Breath Quick Tip

Holding on inhale: energizing to the nervous system! Holding on exhale: relaxing to nervous system.

6. Get in the Present Moment through Engaging the Five Senses: Research shows that the more time you spend in the ‘present moment,’ or engaged with what’s happening in the now, the happier you are! A great way to get into the present moment is by focusing on one of the 5 senses. Afterall, you can’t smell tomorrow or taste yesterday. Your senses are an express lane to focus on the present! The five senses can also be used to regulate in a stressful situation. Try this exercise to bring your child out of a stress response and back to the calm present moment.

Name: 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, 1 thing you can taste.

7. Connect to the Heart: By actively creating kind thoughts towards themselves and others, students practice empathy and perspective-taking skills to build social awareness. Begin by having students imagine a “heart hope” or a wish for themselves. Do they hope for themselves to be happy? To be healthy? Then have them imagine a hearth hope for someone they love, like a parent, friend, or pet. Then for someone they are neutral toward, or don’t know very well, like a teacher in their school they’ve seen but never met. Then, create a heart hope for someone who they may not be fond of—perhaps someone who may have been unkind to them. They can complete the exercise by sending a heart hope to their whole school, town, country, world, etc. This simple practice can help students build feelings of kindness toward themselves and others. In particular, they can begin to recognize that generating feelings of kindness for themselves allows them to share kindness with others more easily, particularly those who may challenge them.

8. Slow Down to Appreciate the Little Things with Mindful Eating: Taking time to be aware of what we are experiencing while eating takes us out of “auto-pilot” and into self-awareness. With gratitude for the food, students can reflect on all those who took part in growing and cooking the food, placing them in a state of social-awareness. We often gobble down our food without taking a moment to recognize all that went into growing, making, and delivering our food. By slowing down and cultivating a sense of gratitude for our food, we can change our relationship to it and turn ordinary meals into extraordinary moments of appreciation. Have your child share at least one thing they are grateful for in relation to their food with a partner. Are they thankful for the hands that cooked it? For the farmer who grew it? Are they simply thankful it’s tasty? While in this space of gratitude, you can also have them mention other things they are thankful for as they share food with friends.For a guided experience, take your child through the process of sharing their experience through their five senses with a simple snack, like a piece of fruit or a cracker. For the full mindful experience, guide them through paying attention to their five senses while they focus silently on their food, and then have them share their observations after. The following are some questions you may ask:

How does the food look?

How does it feel?

How does it sound?

How does it smell?

How does it taste?

9. The Science of Gratitude: Research shows that directing the attention towards gratitude can improve positive thinking, as well as overall mood. Try creating a ritual of listing things you are grateful for as a family once a day.

10. Chill-Out with Progressive Muscle Relaxation: This practice is great for kids (and adults) of all ages, whether they’re having trouble sleeping, stressed out, sick and in bed, or acting out. It’s based on the progressive muscle relaxation technique that Dr. Edmund Jacobson developed in the 1920’s. It’s used to help alleviate tension when people are in a situation that makes it difficult for them to relax. Guide your kids with these steps:

1. Bring all of your attention to your right foot, noticing how it feels. Squeeze the right foot, making a fist with your entire right foot and all five toes; tense and squeeze it tightly. Hold this tension for a inhale.

2. Then release all tension in the right foot on exhale. Relax it completely and notice the tension release. You may feel a tingling sensation in the foot.

3. Move slowly up and around the body, squeezing one body part at a time to create tension, immediately followed by the contrasting sensation of release and ease. Here’s a sample progression you can follow:

• Right foot, left foot

• Right ankle and calf, left ankle and calf

• Right knee, left knee

• Right thigh, left thigh

• All feet and legs

• Hips

• Belly

• Entire lower body, from tummy down

• Chest and heart

• Right arm, left arm

• Right hand, left hand

• Shoulders

• Neck

• Face

Whole body (2X)

For younger students, having them imagine glitter, sun, ocean waves, etc move to the different parts of their body is helpful.